Ladies and Gentlemen,

The Vagaina Monologues….the very name of it screams to most men both secure and not “Whoa! that is not for me!”  This is true for both me and my room mate.  However because its valentines day, and i’d had four beers, i agreed to go with my girlfriend and our other room mate.  I was skeptical, not because of i’m insecure about my sexuality, but who names something “vagina monologues” ?  Well i went, and I learned some things…things I did not necessarily agree with.

For anyone who hasn’t been…its a long “play” with several women talking about experiences with their vaginas, both good and bad. Please see this completely factual and unbias article:  http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Vagina_Monologues

I expected it to be rife with women, both on stage and in the audience.  To my surprise there was about a 70 / 30 makeup of women to men…and of those men most of them were there with a woman.  Ok let’s but the homo stereotype to bed.  Yes men, go with your significant others, it will be painful, but hey…suck it up. 

Now to get to the point of this website:  The Vagina Monologues are an unequivically liberal, more or less slander against both men, foreign policy, and white men.  Now i know if any liberal people read this, just bear with me and listen to what i have to say about this.

First of all men in general.  Two of the plays were about rape specifically and how they made women feel on the inside.  One of them was about being sexually molested as a child and becomming a lesbian.  I do feel that i learned something about how women feel about this issue.  It is rather valid that women feel…destroyed..ruined…dispair…irrepairable…disgusting once this happens.  I am not here to argue the validity of their feelings.  Just personally, as a man, i feel it did an injustice to most of who haven’t raped or violated a woman.  Not to mention there are several thousands of men who have been raped as well.  OK got it, its the vagina monologues, not the penis monologues (book idea? maybe) but still.  I didn’t hear any redeeming statistics about how a majority of men do respect women or anything that was not negative towards the 49% minority of humanity.

Second let’s take a look at foreign policy and ideology.  There are several little spiels about the congo and how thousands of women are raped there each year because of past imperialists using the congo as a source for resources.  Essentially they equate imperial exploitation with the fact that the congo is used for its natural resources.  Now the implication is that because Americans buy playstations and cell phones, which all call for certain resources that are harvested in the congo, that we are responsible for the ethnic attrocities that happen because of tribal differences.  How is it our fault?  They claim that the tribes are killing eachother for the lands that have these resources.  When in fact, the tribal violence has always been there and now they just have a convenient excuse to murder eachother.  So they beg and plead that we should all care and feel horrible about whats going on because we need to have cell phones to “text a picture of a party.”  To them i say:  Look, i didn’t give mujabab a machete, i didn’t show him how to hack off an arm.  I have several firearms and i don’t go kill my neighbor for his chevy.  If i did, would i blame michigan for the steel used to make that truck?  no.  Would i demand the people of michigan come and make a big stink about it because their production of this vehicle lead to another persons death?  Nope.  The congo needs to fix its own shit, get a viable government, and grow the fuck up.  Hundreds of nations across the world can govern their own people, whats their excuse?

And finally the point that pissed me off the most…the slam on white people.  One of the monologues was about a Lakota woman in south dakota who experiences daily beatings by her drunken husband.  It goes into rather good detail of their disfunctional relationship.  For years he beats her, forces her to have unpleasant sex, cheats on her and beats her in a drunken rage…alot.  In the end the last words are these:  “They took our land, they took our ways, they took our men.  We want them back!”

Who the fuck is they?  Are you implying that the reason you are being beaten today, the 14th of February in 2009 , is that 200 years ago, when my ancestors were still in Germany and Ireland, is the reason you are experiencing this?  Is it my fault that your husband drinks himself retarded, cheats on you, beats you, and is suicidal is the fault of happenings hundreds of years ago?  Should i blame the fact that i don’t speak German still as part of my heritage on the fact that back in the late 1800s through the 1940s it was not just frowned upon, but persecuted in places such as New York City to be a native German and speak the language in public?  No i don’t.  You know why?  I took it upon myself to learn German, learn of the Kristkind, schnitzel, and traditional beer.  Do i go around cursing WASPs for the fact that i can’t find a decent Catholic church in washington?  Nope.

You are not the sum of experiences that didn’t happen to you.  I did not persecute your ancestors, I did not beat you, I did not rape you, I did not murder you.  You control yourself, your actions, and what you do with your life.  Take a lesson from your savior, Barack Obama.  Rise from adversity, and make something of yoruself, and don’t use your false past as an excuse to be useless.  If the rez sucks, move.